Robert and Linda Green

Through difficult times when physical desires were out of sync, the Greens learned that physical intimacy is more about serving each other than meeting their own needs.

Robert and Linda GreenApr 10, 2019

In This Series (316)
David and Cait
Nov 16, 2022Dallas
Wes and Angie Talley
Nov 9, 2022Dallas
Tobin and Christina Miller
Oct 26, 2022Dallas
Michael and Melinda Parisi
Michael Parisi, Melinda ParisiOct 12, 2022Dallas
David and Denise Renken
Sep 28, 2022Dallas
Bobby and Shari Johns
Sep 14, 2022Dallas
John and Debbie Wingfield
Sep 7, 2022Dallas
Mark and Nancy Rovenstine
Aug 31, 2022Dallas
Todd and Julie Anders
Todd AndersAug 24, 2022Dallas
LaDale and Cynthia Buggs
Aug 3, 2022Dallas
Chris and Katie Sherrod
Jul 27, 2022Dallas
Kyle and Lucina Thompson
Kyle & Lucinda ThompsonJul 20, 2022Dallas
Simon and Katrina Saugier
Jul 13, 2022Dallas
Willie and Gigi Hornberger
Jul 6, 2022Dallas
Mark and Julie Nicholson
Jun 22, 2022Dallas
Nate and Michelle Ball
Jun 15, 2022Dallas
Robbie and Teri Vedrenne
May 25, 2022Dallas
Paul and Kelly Rutherford
May 18, 2022Dallas
David and Tara Jensen
May 11, 2022Dallas
John and Jeanie Cox
May 4, 2022Dallas
Steve and Amie Bradley
Apr 27, 2022Dallas
Chris and Michelle Dishman
Apr 20, 2022Dallas
Kevin and Kelly Mainz
Apr 13, 2022Dallas
Jim and Judy Wimberley
Jim & Judy WimberleyApr 6, 2022Dallas
Dean and Tawney Macfarlan
Mar 30, 2022Dallas
Rob and Haley Thomas
Rob and Haley ThomasMar 23, 2022Dallas
Shane and Alissa Mauldin
Mar 16, 2022Dallas
David and Lauren Kinney
Mar 9, 2022Dallas
Markus and Mary Kay Jabek
Mar 2, 2022Dallas
Martha and Ivan Illarramendi
Feb 16, 2022Dallas
Ryan and Callie Nixon
Ryan & Callie NixonFeb 9, 2022Dallas
Alex and Jen Lesko
Jan 19, 2022Dallas
Jared and Leigh Anne Sullivan
Jan 12, 2022Dallas
Selena and Michael Thompson
Jan 5, 2022Dallas
Russ and Karen Fleig
Dec 15, 2021Dallas
Phil and Beth Brinkmeyer
Dec 8, 2021Dallas
Leonard and Mandy Bagdanov
Dec 1, 2021Dallas
Glenn and Desiree Newblom
Nov 17, 2021Dallas
Michael and Melinda Parisi
Nov 10, 2021Dallas
Bobby and Shari Johns
Nov 3, 2021Dallas
Brett and Jan Bruster
Oct 20, 2021Dallas
Wes and Angie Talley
Oct 13, 2021Dallas
Mac and Sophie Macfarlan
Oct 6, 2021Dallas
John and Debbie Wingfield
Sep 29, 2021
Brett and Chrisey Billman
Sep 15, 2021Dallas
Nate and Michelle Ball
Sep 8, 2021
Mark and Nancy Rovenstine
Aug 25, 2021Dallas
Divorce Panel
Jun 23, 2021
Trey and Shera O'Neal
Jun 16, 2021Dallas
LaDale and Cynthia Buggs
Jun 9, 2021Dallas
Shane and Alissa Mauldin
Jun 2, 2021Dallas
David and Tara Jensen
May 26, 2021Dallas
Jared and Leigh Anne Sullivan
May 19, 2021Dallas
Jim and Judy Wimberley
Jim & Judy WimberleyApr 28, 2021
Ivan and Martha Illarramendi
Apr 28, 2021Dallas
Billy and Amanda Porche
Apr 21, 2021Dallas
Steve and Amie Bradley
Apr 14, 2021Dallas
Griffin and Kami Stroope
Apr 7, 2021Dallas
David and Lauren Kinney
Mar 31, 2021Dallas
Rick and Michelle Howard
Mar 24, 2021Dallas
Glenn and Desiree Newblom
Mar 17, 2021Dallas
Markus and Mary Kay Jabek
Mar 3, 2021Dallas
David and Tara Jensen
Feb 24, 2021Dallas
Brett and Jan Bruster
Jan 20, 2021Dallas
Bobby and Shari Johns
Jan 13, 2021Dallas
Ryan and Callie Nixon
Aug 28, 2020
Steve and Amie Bradley
Jun 2, 2020
Testimony- Brian and Morgan Buchek
Mar 4, 2020Dallas
Testimony - David & Tara Jensen
Mar 2, 2020Plano
Blended Family Panel
Feb 26, 2020Dallas
Testimony - Greg & Jennifer Sutherland
Feb 24, 2020Plano
Testimony - Jacob & April Neely
Feb 17, 2020Plano
Troy and Julia Bussmeir
Feb 7, 2020
Russ and Katie Moyer
Feb 7, 2020
Nick and Rachel Klein
Feb 7, 2020
Mike and Shelly Ahlemeier
Feb 7, 2020
Matt and Andrea Walker
Feb 7, 2020
Luis and Kaylee Caceres
Feb 7, 2020
Graham and Stacey Robbins
Feb 7, 2020
Andy and Jenny Marsh
Feb 7, 2020
Jared and Leigh Anne Sullivan
Feb 5, 2020Dallas
Griffin and Kami Stroope Testimony
Jan 22, 2020
Testimony
Jan 8, 2020
Divorce Panel
Brett Bruster, Bobby Johns, Alissa MauldinNov 20, 2019
Testimony
LaDale & Cynthia BuggsNov 13, 2019
Testimony
Nov 6, 2019
Testimony- Glenn and Desiree Newblom
Oct 23, 2019
Michael and Selena Thompson
Oct 21, 2019
Testimony- Greg and Emily Goodin
Oct 16, 2019
Re|Engage Large Group Testimony
Sep 18, 2019
Re|Engage Large Group Testimony
Sep 11, 2019
Brandon and Brittani Travelstead
Sep 7, 2019
Re|Engage Large Group Testimony
Shane & Alissa MauldinAug 28, 2019
Re|Engage Large Group Testimony
Ryan & Callie Nixon, John & Pam McGeeAug 21, 2019
Re|Engage Large Group Testimony
Dru & Amanda GuillotAug 14, 2019Plano
Martin and Lenore Gao
Jul 24, 2019Dallas
Testimony - Shera and Trey O’Neal
Jul 10, 2019Dallas
John and Debbie Wingfield
Jun 12, 2019
Alex and Jen Lesko
Jun 12, 2019
Tim and Kalyn Gereg
Jun 5, 2019
Jimmy and Michelle Comeaux
May 29, 2019
Raeul and Susan Cox
May 15, 2019
Jason and Mandy Castro
May 15, 2019
David and Robin Howard
May 15, 2019
Ivan and Martha Illarramendi
May 1, 2019
Robert and Linda Green
Robert and Linda GreenApr 10, 2019
LaDale and Cynthia Buggs
Apr 10, 2019
Markus and Mary Kay Jabek
Apr 3, 2019
Billy and Amanda Porche
Mar 27, 2019
Brett and Jan Bruster
Brett & Jan BrusterMar 13, 2019
Greg and Emily Goodin
Mar 6, 2019
Charles and Karen Bundren
Charles & Karen BundrenFeb 6, 2019
Testimony
Nate & Michelle BallJan 30, 2019
Testimony - Jared and Leigh Anne Sullivan
Jared & Leigh Anne SullivanJan 23, 2019
Bobby and Shari Johns
Bobby & Shari JohnsJan 9, 2019
Testimony - LaDale and Cynthia Buggs
LaDale & Cynthia BuggsDec 5, 2018
Re|Engage Spanish Night Testimony - Manuel & Elvia Lemus
Nov 14, 2018
Re|Engage Spanish Night Testimony - Ivan & Martha Illarramendi
Ivan & Martha IllarramendiNov 14, 2018
Ivan and Martha Illarramendi
Ivan & Martha IllarramendiNov 14, 2018
Testimony - Alex and Jen Lesko
Nov 7, 2018
Testimony - Raeul and Susan Cox
Raeul & Susan CoxOct 31, 2018
Simon and Katrina Saugier
Katrina Saugier, Simon SaugierOct 10, 2018
David and Denise Renken
David & Denise RenkenSep 10, 2018Plano
Testimony - Robert & Linda Green
Robert and Linda GreenSep 5, 2018
Testimony - Martin and Lenore Gao
Aug 29, 2018
Shane and Alissa Mauldin
Aug 22, 2018
Testimony - Markus and Mary Kay Jabek
Aug 15, 2018
Testimony - Charles and Karen Bundren
Charles Bundren, Karen Bundren, Charles & Karen BundrenAug 1, 2018
Testimony - Bobby & Shari Johns
Bobby & Shari JohnsJul 18, 2018
Testimony - Ivan & Martha
Ivan & Martha IllarramendiJun 27, 2018
Testimony - Tim & Kalyn Gereg
Jun 20, 2018
Greg & Tonya Gilmer
Greg & Tonya GilmerMay 30, 2018
Testimony - Ryan & Callie Nixon
Ryan & Callie NixonMay 23, 2018
Paul and Kelly Rutherford
Paul & Kelly RutherfordMay 9, 2018
Nate and Michelle Ball
Nate & Michelle BallMay 2, 2018
Kevin and Kelli Mainz
Kevin & Kelly MainzApr 18, 2018
Testimony - Greg and Emily Goodin
Greg Goodin, Emily GoodinMar 28, 2018
Testimony - John and Debbie Wingfield
John Wingfield, Debbie WingfieldMar 14, 2018
Testimony - Shane & Alissa Mauldin
Shane & Alissa MauldinFeb 28, 2018
Brett and Chrisey Billman
Brett & Chrisey BillmanFeb 21, 2018
Todd and Alex Wagner
Todd & Alex WagnerFeb 7, 2018
Teaching - Community
Scott CoyJan 24, 2018
Teaching- Completion
John & Pam McGeeDec 6, 2017
Testimony - Markus & Mary Kay Jabek
Markus & Mary Kay JabekNov 29, 2017
Testimony - Dave & Denise Renken
Dave & Denise RenkenNov 15, 2017
Robert and Liz White
Robert & Liz WhiteNov 8, 2017
Testimony- John and Pam McGee
John & Pam McGeeNov 1, 2017
Testimony- Charles and Karen Bundren
Charles & Karen BundrenOct 25, 2017
Testimony - John & Debbie Wingfield
John & Debbie WingfieldOct 18, 2017
Testimony - Greg & Tonya Gilmer
Greg & Tonya GilmerOct 11, 2017
Testimony - Ryan & Callie Nixon
Ryan & Callie NixonSep 20, 2017
Kyle and Lucina Thompson
Kyle & Lucinda ThompsonSep 13, 2017
Testimony - Jared & Leigh Anne Sullivan
Jared & Leigh Anne SullivanAug 30, 2017
Testimony - Bobby & Shari Johns
Bobby & Shari JohnsAug 23, 2017
John Paul and Rena
Aug 16, 2017
Testimony - Paul & Kelly Rutherford
Paul and Kelly RutherfordJul 26, 2017
Trey and Shera O'Neal
Trey O'Neal , Shera O'NealJul 19, 2017
Testimony - Kevin & Kelli Mainz
Kelli Mainz, Kevin MainzJul 12, 2017
Erick and Gina Frank
Jun 28, 2017
Martin & Lenore Gao Testimony
May 31, 2017
Tyler and Jenny O'Neal
May 24, 2017
Mark and Kathy Thomas
May 17, 2017
Peter and Eleanor Boynton
May 10, 2017
Testimony - Shane & Alissa Mauldin
May 3, 2017
Eric and Catherine Couch
Eric Couch, Catherine CouchApr 19, 2017
Bill and Ann Daly
Mar 29, 2017
Testimony - LaDale & Cynthia Buggs
Mar 22, 2017
Testimony - Nate & Michelle Ball
Nate Ball, Michelle Ball Mar 15, 2017
Michael and Stefanie Santiago
Mar 6, 2017
Steve and Natalie Hamm
Re|EngageFeb 20, 2017
Testimony - Brett & Chrisey Billman
Brett Billman, Chrisey BillmanFeb 15, 2017
Chris and Charece Robbins
Feb 8, 2017
Testimony - Charles & Karen Bundren
Feb 1, 2017
Klein and Holly Swannie
Jan 18, 2017
Dean and Tawney Macfarlan
Jan 11, 2017
Mark and Nancy Rovenstine
Dec 21, 2016
Testimony - Kevin and Kelli Mainz
Nov 30, 2016
Testimony - Robert & Liz White
Liz White, Robert White Nov 9, 2016
Testimony - John & Debbie Wingfield
Oct 26, 2016
Testimony - Mark & Kathy Thomas
Oct 12, 2016
Testimony - Bobby and Shari Johns
Oct 5, 2016
Testimony - Simon & Katrina Saugier
Simon Saugier, Katrina SaugierSep 28, 2016
Testimony - Shane & Alissa Mauldin
Shane Mauldin, Alissa MauldinSep 21, 2016
Teaching - The Importance of Fun in Marriage
John & Pam McGeeSep 14, 2016
Testimony
Paul and Kelly RutherfordAug 24, 2016
Teaching - Sexual Intimacy
Robert and Linda GreenAug 17, 2016
Rick and Michele Howard
Re|EngageAug 10, 2016
Scott and Laura DeBow
Re|EngageJul 27, 2016
Zech and Kim Lumpkin
Re|EngageJul 20, 2016
Tyler and Jenny O'Neal Testimony
Re|EngageJul 13, 2016
Scott and Kristen Kedersha
Re|EngageJun 22, 2016
Bill and Ann Daly
Re|EngageJun 15, 2016
Bobby and Shari Johns
Re|EngageJun 8, 2016
Newly and Karen Spikes
Jun 2, 2016
Jon and Kathy Flaming
Re|EngageMay 11, 2016
Brett and Jan Bruster
Re|EngageApr 27, 2016
Reid and Jenny Griffin
Re|EngageApr 20, 2016
Kyle and Lucina Thompson
Re|EngageApr 13, 2016
Chris and Charece Robbins
Re|EngageMar 23, 2016
Brett and Chrisey Billman
Re|EngageMar 9, 2016
Dee and Roddy Elliott
Re|EngageMar 2, 2016
Derek and Stacy Braziel
Re|EngageFeb 17, 2016
Greg and Tonya Gilmer
Re|EngageFeb 3, 2016
Adam and Brooke Fish
Re|EngageJan 27, 2016
Shane and Alissa Mauldin
Re|EngageJan 13, 2016
Everett and Emily Alexander
Re|EngageJan 6, 2016
Mark and Kathy Thomas
Re|EngageDec 16, 2015
Divorce Panel
Re|EngageDec 9, 2015
Matt and Amy Levy
Re|EngageNov 18, 2015
Robert and Liz White
Re|EngageNov 4, 2015
Bryce and Elizabeth Erickson
Re|EngageOct 21, 2015
Greg and Tonya Gilmer
Re|EngageOct 7, 2015
Chris and Charece Robbins
Re|EngageSep 30, 2015
Dru and Amanda Guillot
Re|EngageSep 23, 2015
Dee and Roddy Elliott
Re|EngageSep 16, 2015
Warren and Angie Wright
Re|EngageSep 9, 2015
Derek and Stacy Braziel
Re|EngageSep 2, 2015
Chris and Dana Adamson
Re|EngageJul 10, 2015
Jeremy and Mindi Patty
Re|EngageJul 8, 2015
Bobby and Shari Johns
Re|EngageJun 17, 2015
Jim and Judy Wimberley
Re|EngageJun 3, 2015
Kevin and Kelli Mainz
Re|EngageMay 20, 2015
Brett and Chrisey Billman
Re|EngageMay 11, 2015
Jason and Mandy Castro
Re|EngageMay 6, 2015
Kyle and Lucina Thompson
Re|EngageApr 29, 2015
Reid and Jenny Griffin
Re|EngageApr 22, 2015
Greg and Tonya Gilmer
Re|EngageApr 1, 2015
Raeul and Susan Cox
Re|EngageMar 18, 2015
Dee and Roddy Elliott
Re|EngageFeb 25, 2015
John and Meredith Hall
Re|EngageFeb 18, 2015
Ryan and Callie Nixon
Re|EngageFeb 11, 2015
Adam and Brooke Fish
Re|EngageJan 28, 2015
Shane and Alissa Mauldin
Re|EngageJan 14, 2015
Bobby and Shari Johns
Re|EngageDec 3, 2014
Bobby and Shari Johns
Re|EngageDec 3, 2014
Greg and Tonya Gilmer
Greg Gilmer, Re|Engage, Tanya GilmerNov 19, 2014
Robert and Liz White
Re|EngageNov 12, 2014
A.C. and Debi Ndindjock
Re|EngageNov 5, 2014
Mark and Nancy Rovenstine
Re|EngageOct 22, 2014
Reid and Jenny Griffin
Re|EngageOct 15, 2014
Bryce and Elizabeth Erickson
Re|EngageOct 13, 2014
Bill and Kathryn Buntyn
Re|EngageOct 1, 2014
Nate and Teresa Graybill
Re|EngageSep 24, 2014
Robert and Lou Ann McMillen
Re|EngageSep 17, 2014
Dee and Roddy Elliott
Re|EngageSep 17, 2014
Kirk and Cathy McJunkin
Re|EngageAug 27, 2014
Adam and Jackie Tarnow - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageAug 13, 2014
Kyle and Lucina Thompson - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageJul 30, 2014
Joey and Christian Rider - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJul 2, 2014
Jason and Mandy Castro - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJun 25, 2014
Jeff and Martha Sharrock - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJun 18, 2014
Scott and Kristen Kedersha - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJun 11, 2014
Zech and Kim Lumpkin - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJun 4, 2014
Chris and Charece Robbins - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageMay 7, 2014
Robert and Linda Green
Re|EngageApr 30, 2014
Everett and Emily Alexander - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageApr 23, 2014
Bobby and Shari Johns - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageApr 16, 2014
Neal and Ann Holford - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageApr 9, 2014
Les and Desi Brown - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageMar 26, 2014
Simon and Katrina Saugier - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJan 22, 2014
Mark and Nancy Rovenstine - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJan 15, 2014
Chris and Dana Adamson - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageJan 8, 2014
Rick and Michele Howard - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageDec 18, 2013
Divorce Panel - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageDec 11, 2013
Bryce and Elizabeth Erickson - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageNov 20, 2013
Dee and Roddy Elliott - re|engage Testimony
Re|EngageNov 13, 2013
Mike and Laura Labunski
Re|EngageNov 6, 2013
Robert and Liz White - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageOct 30, 2013
Eddy and Rachel Badrina - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageOct 23, 2013
Shane and Alissa Mauldin - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageOct 16, 2013
David and Denise Renken - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageOct 9, 2013
Reid and Jenny Griffin - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageSep 25, 2013
A.C. and Debi Ndindjock - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageSep 18, 2013
Joey and Christian Rider - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageSep 11, 2013
Scott and Kristen Kedersha
Re|EngageAug 7, 2013
Jeff and Martha Sharrock
Re|EngageJul 31, 2013
Neal and Ann Holford - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMay 29, 2013
Wes and Brandy Butler - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageApr 3, 2013
Andy and Jennifer Bailey - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMar 27, 2013
Lance and Mandy Sisco - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageJan 16, 2013
Leonard and Mandy Bagdanov - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageDec 19, 2012
Blake and Rebecca Holmes - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageOct 10, 2012
Chris and Dana - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageAug 8, 2012
Catherine and Tom - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageApr 25, 2012
Angie and Warren Wright - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMar 28, 2012
Teri and Robbie Vedrenne - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMar 21, 2012
Tawney and Dean Macfarlan - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMar 14, 2012
Brooke and Adam Fish - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageFeb 29, 2012
Judy and Jim Wimberly - Re|Engage Testiomony
Re|EngageFeb 22, 2012
Kim and Zech Lumpkin - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageFeb 8, 2012
Mary and Ted Randall - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageJan 11, 2012
Susan and Raeul - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageDec 21, 2011
Katie and Brandon Lokey - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageDec 14, 2011
Mindi and Jeremy - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageNov 30, 2011
Lisbeth and Hil Bowman - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageOct 19, 2011
Meredith and John Hall - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageSep 28, 2011
Tanna and Rick - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageSep 14, 2011
Cathy and Kirk McJunkin - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageAug 24, 2011
Crystal and Anthony Obey - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageJul 27, 2011
Rachel and Eddy
Re|EngageJun 29, 2011
Lucina and Kyle Thompson - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageJun 22, 2011
Adam and Aleks Stewart - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageJun 15, 2011
Linda and John Berry - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMay 25, 2011
Lora and Jeff Strese - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMay 11, 2011
Julie and Todd Anders - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageApr 27, 2011
Cheryl and Jeff Scruggs - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageApr 20, 2011
Jackie and Adam Tarnow - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMar 23, 2011
Ann and Matt Piper - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageFeb 16, 2011
Cindy and Mike Homsher - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageNov 3, 2010
Julie and Scott Sedberry - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageOct 13, 2010
Rebecca and Chip Dickens - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageAug 25, 2010
Missy and David Leventhal - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageAug 18, 2010
Carrie and Troy Patterson - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageJun 30, 2010
Sheri and Brett Johnston - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMay 19, 2010
Tanna and Rick Wisner - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMay 12, 2010
Anna and Kavon Moradi - Re|Engage Testimony
Re|EngageMar 24, 2010

In This Series (373)

Robert Hello! my name is Robert Green and this is my lovely wife of 35 years Linda Sue. We are empty nesters of 2 boys. In this picture we just finished flying a couple of Harris hawks outside a castle in Ireland. They were on a year-long backpacking trip to 30 countries and we joined them in Ireland for a week. It was awesome!

Linda We got married on St. Patrick’s Day in 1984.

One of my favorite things about getting married on St Patrick's Day is that I changed my last name to Green!

Robert I'm sure you are wondering who's the guy she married.

As George Costanza once said…these are the remnants of a once proud civilization

I'm smiling big in that pic. Why? Because like any guy, I know the honeymoon is coming. But the start of my married sex life would immediately hit a speed bump.

Linda We got to Maui and headed to the pool. I put oil on like I had always done, but evidently the sun is different in Maui because what normally would have been a tan turned into a major sunburn.

Robert She kinda looked like this. I had to rub aloe vera on her but yet I could not touch her if you know what I mean. After her fever broke we had a great time!

Our only claims to fame is that I'm a graduate of the Fightin' Texas Aggie Class of 1982, and for 4 years Linda held the career record for free throw percentage at the University of Louisiana in Monroe. Yes, Linda is a minor celebrity.

It's our privilege to work with a lot of couples in marriage ministry at Watermark, and we are seeing more and more couples who struggle sexually. We know this can be an area of significant pain and please know that you CAN find healing. Tonight, for the first part of our talk, we want to talk about one very specific scenario: where one spouse has a higher sex drive than the other.

Linda We'd like to start by sharing our own story in this area, then share with you some things that helped us.

I grew up in a Christian home and came to a saving faith in Jesus when I was 9. My parents modeled love and affection toward each other and taught me that sex was “God's gift and His design for couples to enjoy in marriage”. I never got the “sex talk” but in their defense, they felt I probably learned all I needed when I walked in on them at age 6.

I belonged to Jesus, but I had a rebellious heart and spent the first 22 years of my life pursuing the things of this world - especially in my college years where my poor choices led to inappropriate relationships, heartache, guilt and shame.

But God, in His mercy pursued me through it all and turned my rebellious heart back to Him. He put a new desire in my heart – to walk in His ways. God has declared me blameless because Christ's shed blood on the cross has covered my sins. Although I battled thoughts of guilt and shame over the years, I was able to fight that battle with truth - that I am forgiven and a precious daughter of the King who delights in me and loves me with unfailing love. And by his grace I was able to go into marriage experiencing freedom in the area of sex.

Be Encouraged! We have a God who rescues redeems heals and restores. He is able to do so much more than you can imagine or hope.

Robert I also placed my faith in Jesus at an early age. I remained a virgin until we married but had plenty of sexual promiscuity, especially in high school.

I learned about sex primarily from culture. In my church we were taught to stay away from sex because only bad things can happen until you get married. As a first born I complied but it was a daily struggle against my hormones that often resulted in masturbation.

I couldn't wait to have "legal sex" but I was not really looking to get married until I met Linda in 1982. After she beat me in a free throw shooting contest I knew she was The One and we married 18 months after meeting.

This kicked off [Phase 1] in our sex drive story. To be honest with you, this talk started on a napkin at a restaurant. We started drawing on the napkin a picture of our journey, which you now see in this chart. It's a little corny but we think it will help convey the story.

Linda The pink line depicts my sex drive and the blue line Robert's. During Phase 1 we had a robust sex life where our desires were in sync.

As young marrieds we were in a church where sex was never really talked about, so our own experiences were our guide and we were having fun. It never really dawned on us that couples struggled with sex.

In 2008 we entered [Phase 2]. This is when menopause hit and I wasn't sure what was going on. I couldn't sleep, think, had no energy and my sex drive disappeared, and I didn't know how to handle it. I didn't want to hurt Robert so I tried to avoid situations that might trigger his desire, like undressing in front of him.

I was working with my doctor and trying different natural remedies but nothing seemed to be helping. And then it felt like everything came crashing down when my dad died suddenly. I was very close to him – his only daughter and we shared the same birthday. I found myself overwhelmed with grief while dealing with the menopause stuff.

Robert During this time Linda was sometimes avoiding me (which made her feel bad) and I didn't really know why, and neither did she. We were not quite sure what to do. So I started adjusting my expectations. While I was frustrated by it I knew she was grieving the loss of her dad and I hoped she would snap out of it.

I hit 50 during this phase and started seeing the effects of mid-life, including a decrease in my sex drive. In some respects this was a blessing because it helped me to lower my expectations regarding frequency.

But during Phase 2 we were not in a desert. There were plenty of times of passion, just not with the frequency we had once enjoyed. For example, on our 25th anniversary we had a fun time in Car #23 on the mile-long Whistler gondola!

Linda Hey, at least we showed the restraint to skip #22, which was the glass bottom car.

Robert When we give this talk we often get the question: how long is the ride?

Linda A couple of things happened in 2010 that led us to [Phase 3].

First, I decided to try hormone replacement therapy. After trying a few options, I found a combination that did wonders for my energy and sex drive. You can see from the chart that every time I receive a treatment, which is a few times a year, it has an immediate impact on my sex drive.

Second, I attended a Bible study program that taught me how to memorize scripture, meditate on His Word, journal and pray, which helped me grow in my dependence on God.

Which was critical for me because when our sex drives flipped there were occasions when Robert didn't seem to desire me, and I would start to believe lies, like I was undesirable, and I would question my body image. But because of my time in God's word, I had the tools to fight these lies. I was reminded that what God tells me is true: that I'm made in His image, and that He loves me.

RobertToday, I can tell you that our sex life is better than ever. Yes, there are times when we are not as in-sync as we once were, but because we have each had seasons of being on the high and low side, we better understand each other and have more compassion for each other.

So we would like to leave you with 4 things that we learned through this journey. These were very helpful to us, and we've seen them be helpful to others. We believe these 4 things apply whether you are age 27, 47, 67 or anywhere in between.

  1. Communicate

We had to learn how to talk about this. And so must you. I TOTALLY understand how awkward this can be for many of you in this room. But this is important. Really important. If you personally are struggling in the area of sex, you must tell your spouse. Even if you do not know what is happening, which was often our case, it will be helpful to let your spouse into your struggle. By not discussing it you open the door to misunderstandings between you. AND, you actually deny your spouse the opportunity to love you if you keep it to yourself.

[Galatians 6:2 – Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.]

Linda When Robert wanted to talk about this topic, I would often take it personally. So if your spouse comes to you and wants to discuss this topic, listen compassionately and with an open mind. Hear their point of view. It surprised us how often one of us would be reluctant to discuss this topic yet the other was thinking almost the exact same thing! Each time we talked about sex, it became easier to discuss the next time.

We have also learned that as awkward as it is, it's important to communicate what you like sexually. It was hard for me to share what I liked. Robert helped me understand that I wasn't being selfish, because it was important to him to please me. In a marriage where both spouses are focused on serving each other, this is actually a way to love each other.

Robert 2. Don't pressure

This point is primarily for the spouse with the higher drive.

When Linda hit menopause and her desire changed dramatically, I quickly learned that pressuring her for sex was not a good idea. I tried to ask nicely, like "Feeling frisky TODAY?", but that would often make her feel guilty and put a damper on the evening. Another tip: if she's crying and you are comforting her, don't try to turn that into a sexual encounter.

Look at Paul's words in Philippians 2:

[Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.]

So, we are called to mutually serve one another. Pressuring your spouse to meet your needs is not "serving" them. We have found that a better way is to go back to #1 and discuss this in a way that honors your spouse.

Linda There were times when I found myself frustrated. That's when expressing those frustrations to God, asking him to change my heart, and allowing him to work in me made a difference. I found that my focus would change away from my needs.

One of the things that helped me a lot was trying to see the situation through Robert's eyes, so think for a moment about what you would do if your sex drives flipped. If you became the one on the low side, would you be encouraged if your spouse related to you the way that you are relating to them now? If not, what will you do to change that?

Robert 3. Don't withhold

This point is primarily for the spouse with the lower drive. This is the spouse that is in the position of power. When my desire is lower, I control the frequency with which we have sex. So how is a Christian in power supposed to act towards those under them? Consider the words of Jesus:

[Mark 10:42-44 – Jesus called them together and said, “You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all."]

I am to serve, and that includes my spouse. Remember, your spouse does not have another sexual outlet. You are it.

Some spouses do not understand how much of a physical need sex is for their spouse. Paul understood this when he counseled couples in Corinth:

[1 Corinthians 7:3-5 – The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.]

Linda When we marry we give our bodies as a gift to our spouse. And It's important that we don't take that gift back - even when the demands of life get hard. You might be worn out from a day at work, or caring for an elderly parent.

When I was exhausted from nursing babies, caring for toddlers, the teenage years or the craziness of menopause – sex was the last thing on my mind but that's where sex starts.

Scripture has really helped to change my thinking. When negative thoughts like “I don't want to have sex” come into my mind I try to apply 2 Corinthians 10:5:

[We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ…]

When I surrender that thought to God, he will replace it with a desire to serve my spouse. I must choose to change my attitude and give unselfishly and allow God to work change, then I can focus on ways to make sex work, which means I might need to get creative.

For example, scheduling a time for sex. A quickie works great. When intercourse is not an option, there are plenty of other ways to pleasure your spouse!

Robert 4. Share

If you are struggling, it is wise to bring others into the conversation. This may be very difficult – it's hard enough to share with your spouse much less others! At our church the first place would normally be your small group members, guys with guys and girls with girls. Let them be the ones to help you decide the next steps to take. If you are not in a small group in your church, we highly recommend that you find a church that can be a safe place to discuss this.

[Proverbs 15:22 – Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.]

It will be helpful to have others around you because this can be complicated.

Linda Our sexual desire can be affected in many ways. Sometimes there is physical pain involved in sex and that needs to be shared with a doctor. It could also be a medical issue, so a next step might be to consult a medical professional. For me, hormone replacement therapy obviously made a big difference.

It could be something spiritual - because our spiritual life is so closely tied to our sex life. Are you trusting the Lord with everything, including your sex life? As you share this struggle with your group, ask them if they see any areas of your life where you could be struggling to submit and trust the Lord.

If sexual abuse is part of your story, there are ministries that can help. Don't suffer in silence. And if you are involved in porn, we beg you to seek help because it will impact your intimacy greatly.

Robert So to summarize the talk so far, Communicate | Don't Pressure | Don't Withhold | Share. Or, put another way, Communicate, Serve, and Share. We want to be crystal clear about one thing: you should leave here with a desire to better serve your spouse. Guys, if all you heard tonight is that your wife should not withhold sex, you have totally missed the point. Ladies, if all you heard tonight is that your husband should stop pressuring you for sex, you have missed the point. You MUST talk about this and come to a place where you are serving one another.

And please understand: if you make changes based on what you heard tonight, and things do not improve immediately, don't be discouraged! This may take time. That's why you need some friends around you to help encourage you on the journey.

My friends, God wants us to enjoy this incredible gift of sex. In case there's any doubt, realize that he dedicated an entire book in the Bible (Song of Solomon) to this topic!

Linda You can also visit the re|engage website to find some really helpful resources. Go to: [MarriageHelp.org/Sexual-Intimacy]

One of the resources mentioned on the site is a book called "Intimate Issues" by Linda Dillow and Elaine Pintus. It is a handbook to help you transform your sexual attitudes and enhance your sexual relationship. I recently led a group of women through it and I highly recommend it!

Robert We recognize in a crowd of this size there is bound to be some couples struggling in their relationship, perhaps specifically in the area of sex, and the thought of physical intimacy is a world away. Don't feel any pressure to leave here tonight and have sex or act like you have it all together in this area. We encourage you to simply get started talking about it.

If you would like help navigating how to talk about this with your spouse, or have questions about anything we've discussed, your leader would love to help.

Thank you for letting us share tonight!


About 're|engage Testimonies'

This series contains teachings and testimonies of God's transforming power in marriages at re|engage. re|engage is designed specifically to address needs in marriage by helping couples move towards oneness in their marriage through stories of grace, teaching and small groups. Whether your marriage needs to be reignited, or is in need of a complete resurrection, re|engage is a safe place for couples to reconnect. It is a 16-week experience which includes a time of praise and worship, a teaching or a testimony by a couple who has experienced victory in the midst of hard times, and small group time which follows a specified curriculum. We meet every Wednesday night, 6:30-8:15 p.m. in The Loft (7540 LBJ Freeway @ Park Central, Dallas). Childcare is provided and registration is not required.