After countless emotional affairs, a pornography addiction, and eventually falling into infidelity, Ivan and Martha were headed straight for divorce. Hear how God restored and redeemed their marriage.
Ivan & Martha Illarramendi • Nov 14, 2018
Bobby and Shari JohnsNov 8, 2023 • Dallas |
Monte and Marsha DunnNov 1, 2023 • Dallas |
Julie and Mark NicholsonOct 25, 2023 • Dallas |
Jerry and LoriOct 18, 2023 • Dallas |
Steve and Amie BradleyOct 11, 2023 • Dallas |
Marcus and Carol BrownSep 20, 2023 • Dallas |
Nancy and Mark RovenstineSep 6, 2023 • Dallas |
Kyle and Lucina ThompsonAug 23, 2023 • Dallas |
David and CaitAug 9, 2023 • Dallas |
Mandy and Leonard BagdanovAug 2, 2023 • Dallas |
Michelle and Nate BallJul 26, 2023 • Dallas |
Nate and Megan MickishJul 19, 2023 • Dallas |
Wes and Angie TalleyJul 5, 2023 • Dallas |
Jen and Alex LeskoJun 21, 2023 • Dallas |
Alissa and Shane MauldinJun 14, 2023 • Dallas |
Daniel and Cynthia CostaJun 7, 2023 • Dallas |
Sheri and Brett JohnstonMay 31, 2023 • Dallas |
Robert and Linda GreenMay 24, 2023 • Dallas |
John and Jeanie CoxMay 17, 2023 • Dallas |
Wade and Betsy NowlinMay 10, 2023 • Dallas |
David and Tara JensenMay 3, 2023 • Dallas |
Jim and Judy WimberleyJim & Judy Wimberley • Apr 12, 2023 • Dallas |
Jimmy and Michelle ComeauxApr 5, 2023 • Dallas |
Kevin and Kelli MainzMar 29, 2023 |
David and Manuela AcostaRe|Engage • Mar 26, 2023 |
Rob and Haley ThomasMar 22, 2023 • Dallas |
Robbie and Teri VedrenneMar 15, 2023 • Dallas |
Rick and Michelle HowardMar 1, 2023 • Dallas |
Matt and Jenn FarlowFeb 22, 2023 • Dallas |
David and Lauren KinneyJan 25, 2023 • Dallas |
Jared and Leigh Anne SullivanJared & Leigh Anne Sullivan • Jan 11, 2023 • Dallas |
Markus and Mary Kay JabekJan 4, 2023 • Dallas |
Neil and Jody CurranDec 7, 2022 • Dallas |
Scot and Michelle BuchananNov 30, 2022 • Dallas |
David and CaitNov 16, 2022 • Dallas |
Wes and Angie TalleyNov 9, 2022 • Dallas |
Tobin and Christina MillerOct 26, 2022 • Dallas |
Michael and Melinda ParisiMichael Parisi, Melinda Parisi • Oct 12, 2022 • Dallas |
David and Denise RenkenSep 28, 2022 • Dallas |
Bobby and Shari JohnsSep 14, 2022 • Dallas |
John and Debbie WingfieldSep 7, 2022 • Dallas |
Mark and Nancy RovenstineAug 31, 2022 • Dallas |
Todd and Julie AndersTodd Anders • Aug 24, 2022 • Dallas |
LaDale and Cynthia BuggsAug 3, 2022 • Dallas |
Chris and Katie SherrodJul 27, 2022 • Dallas |
Kyle and Lucina ThompsonKyle & Lucinda Thompson • Jul 20, 2022 • Dallas |
Simon and Katrina SaugierJul 13, 2022 • Dallas |
Willie and Gigi HornbergerJul 6, 2022 • Dallas |
Mark and Julie NicholsonJun 22, 2022 • Dallas |
Nate and Michelle BallJun 15, 2022 • Dallas |
Robbie and Teri VedrenneMay 25, 2022 • Dallas |
Paul and Kelly RutherfordMay 18, 2022 • Dallas |
David and Tara JensenMay 11, 2022 • Dallas |
John and Jeanie CoxMay 4, 2022 • Dallas |
Steve and Amie BradleyApr 27, 2022 • Dallas |
Chris and Michelle DishmanApr 20, 2022 • Dallas |
Kevin and Kelly MainzApr 13, 2022 • Dallas |
Jim and Judy WimberleyJim & Judy Wimberley • Apr 6, 2022 • Dallas |
Dean and Tawney MacfarlanMar 30, 2022 • Dallas |
Rob and Haley ThomasRob and Haley Thomas • Mar 23, 2022 • Dallas |
Shane and Alissa MauldinMar 16, 2022 • Dallas |
David and Lauren KinneyMar 9, 2022 • Dallas |
Markus and Mary Kay JabekMar 2, 2022 • Dallas |
Martha and Ivan IllarramendiFeb 16, 2022 • Dallas |
Ryan and Callie NixonRyan & Callie Nixon • Feb 9, 2022 • Dallas |
Alex and Jen LeskoJan 19, 2022 • Dallas |
Jared and Leigh Anne SullivanJan 12, 2022 • Dallas |
Selena and Michael ThompsonJan 5, 2022 • Dallas |
Russ and Karen FleigDec 15, 2021 • Dallas |
Phil and Beth BrinkmeyerDec 8, 2021 • Dallas |
Leonard and Mandy BagdanovDec 1, 2021 • Dallas |
Glenn and Desiree NewblomNov 17, 2021 • Dallas |
Michael and Melinda ParisiNov 10, 2021 • Dallas |
Bobby and Shari JohnsNov 3, 2021 • Dallas |
Brett and Jan BrusterOct 20, 2021 • Dallas |
Wes and Angie TalleyOct 13, 2021 • Dallas |
Mac and Sophie MacfarlanOct 6, 2021 • Dallas |
John and Debbie WingfieldSep 29, 2021 |
Brett and Chrisey BillmanSep 15, 2021 • Dallas |
Nate and Michelle BallSep 8, 2021 |
Mark and Nancy RovenstineAug 25, 2021 • Dallas |
Divorce PanelJun 23, 2021 |
Trey and Shera O'NealJun 16, 2021 • Dallas |
LaDale and Cynthia BuggsJun 9, 2021 • Dallas |
Shane and Alissa MauldinJun 2, 2021 • Dallas |
David and Tara JensenMay 26, 2021 • Dallas |
Jared and Leigh Anne SullivanMay 19, 2021 • Dallas |
Jim and Judy WimberleyJim & Judy Wimberley • Apr 28, 2021 |
Ivan and Martha IllarramendiApr 28, 2021 • Dallas |
Billy and Amanda PorcheApr 21, 2021 • Dallas |
Steve and Amie BradleyApr 14, 2021 • Dallas |
Griffin and Kami StroopeApr 7, 2021 • Dallas |
David and Lauren KinneyMar 31, 2021 • Dallas |
Rick and Michelle HowardMar 24, 2021 • Dallas |
Glenn and Desiree NewblomMar 17, 2021 • Dallas |
Markus and Mary Kay JabekMar 3, 2021 • Dallas |
David and Tara JensenFeb 24, 2021 • Dallas |
Brett and Jan BrusterJan 20, 2021 • Dallas |
Bobby and Shari JohnsJan 13, 2021 • Dallas |
Ryan and Callie NixonAug 28, 2020 |
Steve and Amie BradleyJun 2, 2020 |
Testimony- Brian and Morgan BuchekMar 4, 2020 • Dallas |
Testimony - David & Tara JensenMar 2, 2020 • Plano |
Blended Family PanelFeb 26, 2020 • Dallas |
Testimony - Greg & Jennifer SutherlandFeb 24, 2020 • Plano |
Testimony - Jacob & April NeelyFeb 17, 2020 • Plano |
Troy and Julia BussmeirFeb 7, 2020 |
Nick and Rachel KleinFeb 7, 2020 |
Mike and Shelly AhlemeierFeb 7, 2020 |
Matt and Andrea WalkerFeb 7, 2020 |
Luis and Kaylee CaceresFeb 7, 2020 |
Graham and Stacey RobbinsFeb 7, 2020 |
Andy and Jenny MarshFeb 7, 2020 |
Jared and Leigh Anne SullivanFeb 5, 2020 • Dallas |
Griffin and Kami Stroope TestimonyJan 22, 2020 |
TestimonyJan 8, 2020 |
Divorce PanelBrett Bruster, Bobby Johns, Alissa Mauldin • Nov 20, 2019 |
TestimonyLaDale & Cynthia Buggs • Nov 13, 2019 |
TestimonyNov 6, 2019 |
Testimony- Glenn and Desiree NewblomOct 23, 2019 |
Michael and Selena ThompsonOct 21, 2019 |
Testimony- Greg and Emily GoodinOct 16, 2019 |
Re|Engage Large Group TestimonySep 18, 2019 |
Re|Engage Large Group TestimonySep 11, 2019 |
Brandon and Brittani TravelsteadSep 7, 2019 |
Re|Engage Large Group TestimonyShane & Alissa Mauldin • Aug 28, 2019 |
Re|Engage Large Group TestimonyRyan & Callie Nixon, John & Pam McGee • Aug 21, 2019 |
Re|Engage Large Group TestimonyDru & Amanda Guillot • Aug 14, 2019 • Plano |
Martin and Lenore GaoJul 24, 2019 • Dallas |
Testimony - Shera and Trey O’NealJul 10, 2019 • Dallas |
John and Debbie WingfieldJun 12, 2019 |
Alex and Jen LeskoJun 12, 2019 |
Tim and Kalyn GeregJun 5, 2019 |
Jimmy and Michelle ComeauxMay 29, 2019 |
Raeul and Susan CoxMay 15, 2019 |
Jason and Mandy CastroMay 15, 2019 |
David and Robin HowardMay 15, 2019 |
Ivan and Martha IllarramendiMay 1, 2019 |
Robert and Linda GreenRobert and Linda Green • Apr 10, 2019 |
LaDale and Cynthia BuggsApr 10, 2019 |
Markus and Mary Kay JabekApr 3, 2019 |
Billy and Amanda PorcheMar 27, 2019 |
Brett and Jan BrusterBrett & Jan Bruster • Mar 13, 2019 |
Greg and Emily GoodinMar 6, 2019 |
Charles and Karen BundrenCharles & Karen Bundren • Feb 6, 2019 |
TestimonyNate & Michelle Ball • Jan 30, 2019 |
Testimony - Jared and Leigh Anne SullivanJared & Leigh Anne Sullivan • Jan 23, 2019 |
Bobby and Shari JohnsBobby & Shari Johns • Jan 9, 2019 |
Testimony - LaDale and Cynthia BuggsLaDale & Cynthia Buggs • Dec 5, 2018 |
Re|Engage Spanish Night Testimony - Manuel & Elvia LemusNov 14, 2018 |
Re|Engage Spanish Night Testimony - Ivan & Martha IllarramendiIvan & Martha Illarramendi • Nov 14, 2018 |
Ivan and Martha IllarramendiIvan & Martha Illarramendi • Nov 14, 2018 |
Testimony - Alex and Jen LeskoNov 7, 2018 |
Testimony - Raeul and Susan CoxRaeul & Susan Cox • Oct 31, 2018 |
Simon and Katrina SaugierKatrina Saugier, Simon Saugier • Oct 10, 2018 |
David and Denise RenkenDavid & Denise Renken • Sep 10, 2018 • Plano |
Testimony - Robert & Linda GreenRobert and Linda Green • Sep 5, 2018 |
Testimony - Martin and Lenore GaoAug 29, 2018 |
Shane and Alissa MauldinAug 22, 2018 |
Testimony - Markus and Mary Kay JabekAug 15, 2018 |
Testimony - Charles and Karen BundrenCharles Bundren, Karen Bundren, Charles & Karen Bundren • Aug 1, 2018 |
Testimony - Bobby & Shari JohnsBobby & Shari Johns • Jul 18, 2018 |
Testimony - Ivan & MarthaIvan & Martha Illarramendi • Jun 27, 2018 |
Testimony - Tim & Kalyn GeregJun 20, 2018 |
Greg & Tonya GilmerGreg & Tonya Gilmer • May 30, 2018 |
Testimony - Ryan & Callie NixonRyan & Callie Nixon • May 23, 2018 |
Paul and Kelly RutherfordPaul & Kelly Rutherford • May 9, 2018 |
Nate and Michelle BallNate & Michelle Ball • May 2, 2018 |
Kevin and Kelli MainzKevin & Kelly Mainz • Apr 18, 2018 |
Testimony - Greg and Emily GoodinGreg Goodin, Emily Goodin • Mar 28, 2018 |
Testimony - John and Debbie WingfieldJohn Wingfield, Debbie Wingfield • Mar 14, 2018 |
Testimony - Shane & Alissa MauldinShane & Alissa Mauldin • Feb 28, 2018 |
Brett and Chrisey BillmanBrett & Chrisey Billman • Feb 21, 2018 |
Todd and Alex WagnerTodd & Alex Wagner • Feb 7, 2018 |
Teaching - CommunityScott Coy • Jan 24, 2018 |
Teaching- CompletionJohn & Pam McGee • Dec 6, 2017 |
Testimony - Markus & Mary Kay JabekMarkus & Mary Kay Jabek • Nov 29, 2017 |
Testimony - Dave & Denise RenkenDave & Denise Renken • Nov 15, 2017 |
Robert and Liz WhiteRobert & Liz White • Nov 8, 2017 |
Testimony- John and Pam McGeeJohn & Pam McGee • Nov 1, 2017 |
Testimony- Charles and Karen BundrenCharles & Karen Bundren • Oct 25, 2017 |
Testimony - John & Debbie WingfieldJohn & Debbie Wingfield • Oct 18, 2017 |
Testimony - Greg & Tonya GilmerGreg & Tonya Gilmer • Oct 11, 2017 |
Testimony - Ryan & Callie NixonRyan & Callie Nixon • Sep 20, 2017 |
Kyle and Lucina ThompsonKyle & Lucinda Thompson • Sep 13, 2017 |
Testimony - Jared & Leigh Anne SullivanJared & Leigh Anne Sullivan • Aug 30, 2017 |
Testimony - Bobby & Shari JohnsBobby & Shari Johns • Aug 23, 2017 |
John Paul and RenaAug 16, 2017 |
Testimony - Paul & Kelly RutherfordPaul and Kelly Rutherford • Jul 26, 2017 |
Trey and Shera O'NealTrey O'Neal , Shera O'Neal • Jul 19, 2017 |
Testimony - Kevin & Kelli MainzKelli Mainz, Kevin Mainz • Jul 12, 2017 |
Erick and Gina FrankJun 28, 2017 |
Martin & Lenore Gao TestimonyMay 31, 2017 |
Tyler and Jenny O'NealMay 24, 2017 |
Mark and Kathy ThomasMay 17, 2017 |
Peter and EleanorMay 10, 2017 |
Testimony - Shane & Alissa MauldinMay 3, 2017 |
Eric and Catherine CouchEric Couch, Catherine Couch • Apr 19, 2017 |
Bill and Ann DalyMar 29, 2017 |
Testimony - LaDale & Cynthia BuggsMar 22, 2017 |
Testimony - Nate & Michelle BallNate Ball, Michelle Ball • Mar 15, 2017 |
Michael and Stefanie SantiagoMar 6, 2017 |
Steve and Natalie HammRe|Engage • Feb 20, 2017 |
Testimony - Brett & Chrisey BillmanBrett Billman, Chrisey Billman • Feb 15, 2017 |
Chris and Charece RobbinsFeb 8, 2017 |
Testimony - Charles & Karen BundrenFeb 1, 2017 |
Klein and Holly SwannieJan 18, 2017 |
Dean and Tawney MacfarlanJan 11, 2017 |
Mark and Nancy RovenstineDec 21, 2016 |
Testimony - Kevin and Kelli MainzNov 30, 2016 |
Testimony - Robert & Liz WhiteLiz White, Robert White • Nov 9, 2016 |
Testimony - John & Debbie WingfieldOct 26, 2016 |
Testimony - Mark & Kathy ThomasOct 12, 2016 |
Testimony - Bobby and Shari JohnsOct 5, 2016 |
Testimony - Simon & Katrina SaugierSimon Saugier, Katrina Saugier • Sep 28, 2016 |
Testimony - Shane & Alissa MauldinShane Mauldin, Alissa Mauldin • Sep 21, 2016 |
Teaching - The Importance of Fun in MarriageJohn & Pam McGee • Sep 14, 2016 |
TestimonyPaul and Kelly Rutherford • Aug 24, 2016 |
Teaching - Sexual IntimacyRobert and Linda Green • Aug 17, 2016 |
Rick and Michele HowardRe|Engage • Aug 10, 2016 |
Scott and Laura DeBowRe|Engage • Jul 27, 2016 |
Zech and Kim LumpkinRe|Engage • Jul 20, 2016 |
Tyler and Jenny O'Neal TestimonyRe|Engage • Jul 13, 2016 |
Scott and Kristen KedershaRe|Engage • Jun 22, 2016 |
Bill and Ann DalyRe|Engage • Jun 15, 2016 |
Bobby and Shari JohnsRe|Engage • Jun 8, 2016 |
Newly and Karen SpikesJun 2, 2016 |
Jon and Kathy FlamingRe|Engage • May 11, 2016 |
Brett and Jan BrusterRe|Engage • Apr 27, 2016 |
Reid and Jenny GriffinRe|Engage • Apr 20, 2016 |
Kyle and Lucina ThompsonRe|Engage • Apr 13, 2016 |
Chris and Charece RobbinsRe|Engage • Mar 23, 2016 |
Brett and Chrisey BillmanRe|Engage • Mar 9, 2016 |
Dee and Roddy ElliottRe|Engage • Mar 2, 2016 |
Derek and Stacy BrazielRe|Engage • Feb 17, 2016 |
Greg and Tonya GilmerRe|Engage • Feb 3, 2016 |
Adam and Brooke FishRe|Engage • Jan 27, 2016 |
Shane and Alissa MauldinRe|Engage • Jan 13, 2016 |
Everett and Emily AlexanderRe|Engage • Jan 6, 2016 |
Mark and Kathy ThomasRe|Engage • Dec 16, 2015 |
Divorce PanelRe|Engage • Dec 9, 2015 |
Matt and Amy LevyRe|Engage • Nov 18, 2015 |
Robert and Liz WhiteRe|Engage • Nov 4, 2015 |
Bryce and Elizabeth EricksonRe|Engage • Oct 21, 2015 |
Greg and Tonya GilmerRe|Engage • Oct 7, 2015 |
Chris and Charece RobbinsRe|Engage • Sep 30, 2015 |
Dru and Amanda GuillotRe|Engage • Sep 23, 2015 |
Dee and Roddy ElliottRe|Engage • Sep 16, 2015 |
Warren and Angie WrightRe|Engage • Sep 9, 2015 |
Derek and Stacy BrazielRe|Engage • Sep 2, 2015 |
Chris and Dana AdamsonRe|Engage • Jul 10, 2015 |
Jeremy and Mindi PattyRe|Engage • Jul 8, 2015 |
Bobby and Shari JohnsRe|Engage • Jun 17, 2015 |
Jim and Judy WimberleyRe|Engage • Jun 3, 2015 |
Kevin and Kelli MainzRe|Engage • May 20, 2015 |
Brett and Chrisey BillmanRe|Engage • May 11, 2015 |
Jason and Mandy CastroRe|Engage • May 6, 2015 |
Kyle and Lucina ThompsonRe|Engage • Apr 29, 2015 |
Reid and Jenny GriffinRe|Engage • Apr 22, 2015 |
Greg and Tonya GilmerRe|Engage • Apr 1, 2015 |
Raeul and Susan CoxRe|Engage • Mar 18, 2015 |
Dee and Roddy ElliottRe|Engage • Feb 25, 2015 |
John and Meredith HallRe|Engage • Feb 18, 2015 |
Ryan and Callie NixonRe|Engage • Feb 11, 2015 |
Adam and Brooke FishRe|Engage • Jan 28, 2015 |
Shane and Alissa MauldinRe|Engage • Jan 14, 2015 |
Bobby and Shari JohnsRe|Engage • Dec 3, 2014 |
Bobby and Shari JohnsRe|Engage • Dec 3, 2014 |
Greg and Tonya GilmerGreg Gilmer, Re|Engage, Tanya Gilmer • Nov 19, 2014 |
Robert and Liz WhiteRe|Engage • Nov 12, 2014 |
A.C. and Debi NdindjockRe|Engage • Nov 5, 2014 |
Mark and Nancy RovenstineRe|Engage • Oct 22, 2014 |
Reid and Jenny GriffinRe|Engage • Oct 15, 2014 |
Bryce and Elizabeth EricksonRe|Engage • Oct 13, 2014 |
Bill and Kathryn BuntynRe|Engage • Oct 1, 2014 |
Nate and Teresa GraybillRe|Engage • Sep 24, 2014 |
Robert and Lou Ann McMillenRe|Engage • Sep 17, 2014 |
Dee and Roddy ElliottRe|Engage • Sep 17, 2014 |
Kirk and Cathy McJunkinRe|Engage • Aug 27, 2014 |
Adam and Jackie Tarnow - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Aug 13, 2014 |
Kyle and Lucina Thompson - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jul 30, 2014 |
Joey and Christian Rider - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jul 2, 2014 |
Jason and Mandy Castro - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jun 25, 2014 |
Jeff and Martha Sharrock - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jun 18, 2014 |
Scott and Kristen Kedersha - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jun 11, 2014 |
Zech and Kim Lumpkin - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jun 4, 2014 |
Chris and Charece Robbins - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • May 7, 2014 |
Robert and Linda GreenRe|Engage • Apr 30, 2014 |
Everett and Emily Alexander - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Apr 23, 2014 |
Bobby and Shari Johns - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Apr 16, 2014 |
Neal and Ann Holford - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Apr 9, 2014 |
Les and Desi Brown - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Mar 26, 2014 |
Simon and Katrina Saugier - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jan 22, 2014 |
Mark and Nancy Rovenstine - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jan 15, 2014 |
Chris and Dana Adamson - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jan 8, 2014 |
Rick and Michele Howard - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Dec 18, 2013 |
Divorce Panel - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Dec 11, 2013 |
Bryce and Elizabeth Erickson - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Nov 20, 2013 |
Dee and Roddy Elliott - re|engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Nov 13, 2013 |
Mike and Laura LabunskiRe|Engage • Nov 6, 2013 |
Robert and Liz White - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Oct 30, 2013 |
Eddy and Rachel Badrina - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Oct 23, 2013 |
Shane and Alissa Mauldin - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Oct 16, 2013 |
David and Denise Renken - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Oct 9, 2013 |
Reid and Jenny Griffin - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Sep 25, 2013 |
A.C. and Debi Ndindjock - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Sep 18, 2013 |
Joey and Christian Rider - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Sep 11, 2013 |
Scott and Kristen KedershaRe|Engage • Aug 7, 2013 |
Jeff and Martha SharrockRe|Engage • Jul 31, 2013 |
Neal and Ann Holford - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • May 29, 2013 |
Wes and Brandy Butler - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Apr 3, 2013 |
Andy and Jennifer Bailey - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Mar 27, 2013 |
Lance and Mandy Sisco - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jan 16, 2013 |
Leonard and Mandy Bagdanov - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Dec 19, 2012 |
Blake and Rebecca Holmes - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Oct 10, 2012 |
Chris and Dana - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Aug 8, 2012 |
Catherine and Tom - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Apr 25, 2012 |
Angie and Warren Wright - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Mar 28, 2012 |
Teri and Robbie Vedrenne - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Mar 21, 2012 |
Tawney and Dean Macfarlan - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Mar 14, 2012 |
Brooke and Adam Fish - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Feb 29, 2012 |
Judy and Jim Wimberly - Re|Engage TestiomonyRe|Engage • Feb 22, 2012 |
Kim and Zech Lumpkin - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Feb 8, 2012 |
Mary and Ted Randall - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jan 11, 2012 |
Susan and Raeul - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Dec 21, 2011 |
Katie and Brandon Lokey - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Dec 14, 2011 |
Mindi and Jeremy - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Nov 30, 2011 |
Lisbeth and Hil Bowman - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Oct 19, 2011 |
Meredith and John Hall - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Sep 28, 2011 |
Tanna and Rick - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Sep 14, 2011 |
Cathy and Kirk McJunkin - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Aug 24, 2011 |
Crystal and Anthony Obey - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jul 27, 2011 |
Rachel and EddyRe|Engage • Jun 29, 2011 |
Lucina and Kyle Thompson - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jun 22, 2011 |
Adam and Aleks Stewart - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jun 15, 2011 |
Linda and John Berry - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • May 25, 2011 |
Lora and Jeff Strese - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • May 11, 2011 |
Julie and Todd Anders - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Apr 27, 2011 |
Cheryl and Jeff Scruggs - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Apr 20, 2011 |
Jackie and Adam Tarnow - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Mar 23, 2011 |
Ann and Matt Piper - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Feb 16, 2011 |
Cindy and Mike Homsher - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Nov 3, 2010 |
Julie and Scott Sedberry - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Oct 13, 2010 |
Rebecca and Chip Dickens - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Aug 25, 2010 |
Missy and David Leventhal - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Aug 18, 2010 |
Carrie and Troy Patterson - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Jun 30, 2010 |
Sheri and Brett Johnston - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • May 19, 2010 |
Tanna and Rick Wisner - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • May 12, 2010 |
Anna and Kavon Moradi - Re|Engage TestimonyRe|Engage • Mar 24, 2010 |
Ivan Good evening, my name is Ivan Illarramendi and this is my wife Martha. It is a pleasure to be with you this evening and share our story. We hope it encourages you.
I was born in El Paso, TX, I am the oldest of three boys and two girls. I grew up in a Christian home and trusted in Christ during my teenage years. I recall the enjoyment of being involved in church ministries and events growing up. I figured this would balance out all the wrong I was doing with some good works. My early life was heavily influenced by my parents, I saw the importance of working hard and being dedicated to Christ. My father taught me to put God first in everything I do, while my mom would always emphasize the importance of having faith in God. Even so, I was distant from God. My self-worth was determined by my relationships with girls and this led to inappropriate relationships as I entered adulthood. I struggled with anger, selfishness, and lust through my teenage years. When I found the courage to confess these sins to a youth leader, I was criticized and made an example of, which left me feeling alone and angry towards those around me. People that cared for me shared that Christ died for my sins and that all was forgiven. Although I would nod my head and agree with what they were saying, I felt that I needed to DO something to work my way to forgiveness and grace. I am reminded of Truth in Ephesians 2:8-9 “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.”
Martha I was also born in El Paso and I am the oldest of three girls. I remember trusting in Christ at an early age but wasn't fully aware of what that meant. Growing up I was in a loving, playful home. I did, however, learn about the harsh realities of this world at an early age. I was molested by two family members on two separate occasions which left me sad and lonely. Because of fear I never told anyone. I never thought this would affect me, but boy was I wrong. The side effects of what had happened to me didn't really become clear until I was in Jr high and high school. I started to look for affirmation and worth in other people and in inappropriate relationships with boys in high school. Suicidal thoughts ran heavily through my mind and it was only by God’s grace and my parents staying strong in prayer for me that I never had the courage to act on it. I acquired an ability to pretend like nothing was wrong and smile as I masked the pain. While this part of my life was kept secret, I served in church and lived a double life for several years.
Ivan We met when we were teenagers. She won my heart when she knocked herself out doing a cartwheel to impress me. I felt I had it altogether, I had graduated with high accolades and was now in college. I was on my way to getting married and I had a great job. I didn't realize that during this time I was a slave to my own doctrine, and my sin. I stepped into marriage carrying a lot of baggage. It was a full-time job making people believe that I was not a broken person. My wife had no idea who I really was, and I figured she’d be better off not really knowing. I had issues with pornography, lust, and selfishness, but I refused to let my wife in on that part of my life. I used my job as a way to satisfy my ego and focused my efforts into being successful, rather than pursuing Christ and my wife. I had several friends and my wife around me, yet I sought isolation and was not actively seeking any relationship with Christ. This left me without accountability and feeling unfulfilled in everything I did. Adding kids to the mix gave me an opportunity to hide behind a new responsibility. I figured having kids, much like getting married, would change me into a better person. Looking back, I realize that my circumstances did not need to change, I needed to change. I went through the motions of being a dad, a husband, and a church goer often convincing myself that I wasn’t that bad of a person.
Proverbs 18:1 reminds us “Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment.”
Martha It was love at first sight! He was good looking, smart, and was involved in church. I thought, what else could a girl ask for? We got to know each other more as he tried to set me up with one of his friends. We soon began dating and our relationship escalated quickly and became physical. Without realizing, my world began to revolve around just one boy, and he became my salvation instead of God. As time passed things just kept getting more and more out of hand. I decided to leave home as soon as I finished high school to be with Ivan and thought I could handle anything that came my way. After spending almost, a whole year away from home, Ivan and I decided that we should try to go back to doing things right. I moved back home, and we were married Sept 23, 2007. (we celebrate 11 years this Sept!)
I started our marriage fully committed and in love with what I thought was a heaven-sent situation! The man I had fallen in love with since I was 15 was actually my husband and as far as I could see he was the perfect image of a man! I walked in believing that this new chapter of my life was going to be the salvation and the answer I was looking for. I told myself I was a great person. I loved my husband. I loved to go to church and that I was completely normal but who was I kidding? Inside I was dying little by little walking away from the Lord one day at a time. While Ivan kept to himself, my wanting his full attention, my self-esteem, my jealousy, my depression and discipline issues followed me and became my identity. Exodus 20:3 says “You shall have no other gods before Me” and that is the opposite of what I had done, I had made Ivan, my issues and soon my kids my gods and idols. I would run to them when I felt lost instead of running to the one, I know now to be my true Savior. With time I got to see what an incorrect view I had about my husband and myself. I started to notice that Ivan looked for other women's attention so much so that it would happen in front of me, but to avoid a fight I would look the other way or just tell myself it was my jealousy taking over. This behavior gave fuel to the flame of my jealousy. It was like feeding the green monster until it became Hulk. Our marriage became more and more tense and our fights about women and my passivity became like a mini civil war.
Ivan My job relocated our family to Dallas. My relationship with Martha only got worse as we grew further apart. Her focus became our kids and my focus remained on me. I was a man after my own heart, seeking opportunities to feed my own inclinations. My wife and I had ongoing discussions about my desire to gain attention from other women, and even though she was right, I always denied these accusations and fought to maintain a clean reputation with her. Things continued to get worse as I continued emotional affairs at work. My actions would drown the voice of conviction in my life and I would end up going to bed feeling ashamed and defeated. As a husband, I wasn’t connected to my wife and felt that at some point the truth would come to light and our marriage would not survive it. Martha insisted that we find a church that we could attend regularly. We found Watermark and began coming to church every Sunday. As I listened to the messages each week, an internal struggle began. I needed to get help but how or from whom? Proverbs 27:17 reminds us “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”
Martha We kept attending church for appearances, but there was no true relationship with the Lord. We were living a life pretending everything was fine when in reality we were both falling apart. The two-faced life was exhausting for me. All I could think of was how can I get out of this? Divorce, suicide, and even just picking up and disappearing passed through my mind but the Lord was gracious in showing us a glimpse of hope. The Lord blessed us with two little ones and one on the way as we were being relocated to Dallas. Our marriage was still falling apart, and my lack of motivation and low self-esteem had become more and more apparent to everyone. I started believing my own lies, that everything was ok, that all we needed was help with our communication. We found Watermark through a friend and within 9 months of attending I heard about re|engage. We decided to start a new journey and I was excited to move towards God once again. I walked through the doors on Wednesday night looking forward to what God had in store for us.
Ivan As I continued to let my guard down, I began an inappropriate relationship with a woman at work. The relationship quickly escalated which led to an affair with this person. I couldn’t believe who I had become, how far I had drifted from Christ, and how I no longer had an ounce of conviction to do what was right. I asked God for forgiveness and to give me an opportunity to redeem myself and experience His grace. I prayed that He would protect my wife’s heart during these times because the worst was about to come. My prayers were answered rather quickly, as Martha pointed out the re|engage program at Watermark. Jeremiah 29:12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. I thanked God for providing the perfect platform to be open and honest with her. During the first few weeks in our re|engage closed group, I told her everything about me, including the affair. I confessed who I really was and my aspiration to be forgiven. I remember thinking during these times, “It’s going to be world war III. re|engage is about to turn into Re|Enrage!”. However, this didn’t happen. I always knew the truth would come out, but I never imagined it would be met with grace.
Martha We started closed group and everything was looking bright until week 4. As you can imagine my feeling of a new start was short lived when Ivan confessed everything, about the affair with this woman from work, about the addiction he had had to pornography, him actually admitting to me about the multiple emotional affairs he had had throughout our marriage and much more. It came as a shock to me. I knew he flirted with women and he liked being the center of attention, but I didn't expect this. All I knew in that moment is all my insecurities were magnified and the pedestal I had him on was falling hard. I felt alone, very unsure of the future and honestly stupid for not knowing what was going on but God’s grace was with me. I felt an uncontrollable peace come over me that I had not felt before. I knew God was in the midst of this, even if it was painful and chaotic. His love for me and my marriage was being shaped in a way that only He could do. As we came through re|engage I was reminded of who my true Savior is. I learned that for there to be a true change I needed to draw a circle around myself and change the person inside the circle. Having a wonderful group of women around to remind me of biblical truth was more than I could have ever asked for. They told me the Lord would get me through this, and that His love for me was so great that no matter what had happened He was going to see us through it. Lamentations 3: 22-23 says: “Because of the Lords great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Waking up every day remembering that it’s because of His faithfulness that we have a fresh new start is what got me through.
Isaiah 40:31 says “but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint.” The woman I had once been that had to pretend like everything was ok and that was tired of living two different lives was gone. I am now relying on the Lord to be my strength, that no matter what comes my way I am not alone, He is with me. I learned what it is to have a true relationship with the Lord.
Ivan Martha was beyond understanding and although she was extremely hurt, she forgave me and allowed me an opportunity to love her the way God intended. 1 Timothy 2:7 “For God did not give us the spirit of fear, but that of power and love”. I no longer cowered behind my sin but now had the strength to confess, repent and accept His grace. Our community played a big role in helping us get through this, and for the first time we saw hope in moving forward. Our marriage continues to have its struggles. Martha and I have normal fights and fail to communicate from time to time. But we are more self-aware of this and make efforts to do better. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders as I have a group of men that keep me accountable. I don’t fear telling my wife about the struggles I’m experiencing and her the same. 1 John 1:9 - If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us [our] sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. God has taken my story and has flipped the script from shame to redemption, my hopes are that we continue to seek God and allow him to use us as instruments as we live in grace.
Martha I never expected to be up here sharing my deepest secrets with everyone and being fully known, as a broken person, but if given the opportunity I will continue to do it because of what 2 Corinthians 12: 9 says “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness”. Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me” God will be glorified through my mistakes. My husband has changed radically as an honest and fully open person towards me, lovable and fully attentive. My love for my husband is like no other, I thought I loved him before but now I am utterly in love and God has given me a new way to look at him.
If we can leave you with something tonight, it is don't worry how bad your past looks, know that there is a God that loves you and when we leave everything up to Him there is nothing He can’t change. With the Lords help through re|engage, our marriage was saved. The lessons that we find within this book work but only if you are honest with yourself, with your spouse and when you let the Lord work in you. It is thanks to the Lord that this picture of all of us together is possible and we will forever be grateful.
Thank you for letting us share.
This series contains teachings and testimonies of God's transforming power in marriages at re|engage. re|engage is designed specifically to address needs in marriage by helping couples move towards oneness in their marriage through stories of grace, teaching and small groups. Whether your marriage needs to be reignited, or is in need of a complete resurrection, re|engage is a safe place for couples to reconnect. It is a 16-week experience which includes a time of praise and worship, a teaching or a testimony by a couple who has experienced victory in the midst of hard times, and small group time which follows a specified curriculum. We meet every Wednesday night, 6:30-8:15 p.m. in The Loft (7540 LBJ Freeway @ Park Central, Dallas). Childcare is provided and registration is not required.
Re|engage is a weekly ministry for married couples to find help, learn, and grow in their marriage through a small-group setting.