In His Will

In His Will Hero Image In His Will Hero Image

*In the hardest time of their lives, Ross and Jenni Ferrans relied on the steadfast love of the Lord to keep them afloat. Their tragic story of grief and loss also proudly proclaims God’s goodness and trustworthiness. It is a reminder that when we trust in Him, we can find the peace He offers (Romans 8:6). *

Ross: “I went to a Christian summer camp in high school and would love the experience I had each year, but when I left, I didn’t have a biblical community to come back to. I didn’t know how to walk with Christ, so I chased other things in college. But something kept pulling me back to camp.

“My intentions of working at camp for the summer were to have fun, make money, and meet new people. But the Lord was transforming my heart. I experienced Christians who were living for Christ in a way that I’d never seen before. I watched people genuinely following and loving Jesus, and my heart softened. I began reading my Bible regularly and taking steps to follow God faithfully.”

Jenni: “I didn’t have a big ‘aha’ moment – I was blessed to be able to watch my parents lead lives that were honoring to the Lord, and I was discipled and led by faithful people at Watermark as a student. Slowly, my faith and relationship with Christ became my own.

“After marrying in 2014, it took us a while to find a solid community group, but in January 2019, God brought us to our current community group. I look back and see the Lord’s provision even then. We had no idea what was to come, but He set us up with such amazing and authentic friends. He provided people to anchor us to His truth.

“In early summer of 2019, I got pregnant with spontaneous twins. We were so surprised and excited. Everything seemed to be falling into place for what we had pictured for our family.

“When I was 19 weeks pregnant, I woke up on a Wednesday morning and immediately knew something was wrong. As a Labor and Delivery nurse, I knew specific things to check for. I called Ross, and we went to the hospital. The days that followed were a process to save the pregnancy and rescue the babies. Even with trying everything, it soon became evident that we were going to lose at least one of our babies.

“Our son Peter was delivered Saturday morning and lived for ten minutes. In those ten minutes, we sang worship songs and prayed over him.

“Later that evening, our daughter, Josephine, was delivered as well. We had 45 similar minutes with her on earth. We were blessed to have my coworkers and fellow nurses there, mourning and praying with us. The Holy Spirit was there and completely covered us in His peace.

“When you lose something so suddenly and quickly, you are reminded that you have no control. But we knew we could trust God’s sovereign plan.

“The last four years have not been without sorrow or grief beyond words, but we are grateful that our relationships with the Lord created such a strong foundation in our marriage and family well before the birth of our first two children. We trusted that He was with us in every moment.”

R: “We’ve learned that we are not in control of our own lives. God is the one who dictates the days we have. I’ve learned to be more open-handed with things in my life, and I know that whatever is going to happen is in His will, and I can trust that.”

J: “We were protected by God’s grace and mercy with the people around us. When we came home from the hospital, our community group was there. They sat with us in our grief. They’ve walked through every part of this journey with us. And as years have gone on, they’ve done that on multiple occasions in our lives – just showing up and being present.”

R: “We would have never chosen what happened to us, but as parents, we are called to be faithful with the time we are given with our children. We are humbled by the continual reminder that they are ultimately not ours but His. We have been able to see that God works all things together for good (Romans 8:28), even when that path looks very different than what we would have wanted. We now have an almost-three-year-old daughter, Gabrielle, and there is so much joy in our lives still in the midst of our sorrow and grief.”

J: “This is the last thing I would have chosen for my story, but there has been so much fruit not only in our own lives but sharing our story with others has done so much for God’s Kingdom. We’ve been able to walk with other families who’ve experienced similar situations, and we’ve learned so much more about God’s character.”

Shiloh is a ministry for couples to find biblical support and encouragement through miscarriage and infertility. See upcoming Shiloh events.